OO Column: Online Onslaught by Rick Scaia (Pro Wrestling News, Analysis, and Commentary... WWF, WCW, ECW, The Rock, Steve Austin, RVD, Undertaker, Triple H)

ONLINE ONSLAUGHT
SmackDown! Spoilers...
January 16, 2002

by Rick Scaia
Exclusive to OnlineOnslaught.com

The WWF taped tomorrow night's SmackDown! last night in Bossier City, LA... OO Reader Kevin Culpepper was on-hand, and gets big thanks from me for filing this timely and detailed report:

Dark Matches:

Brock Lesnar defeated Randy Orton with a Death Valley Driver - Lesnar has the look, but I was more impressed with Orton.

Dick Ford defeated Eddie Craven with a Sitout Piledriver - REAL YAWNER.

Ron "H20" Waterman defeated Rico Constantino with a Double Underhook Suplex into a Powerbomb- I expected more from Waterman - not impressive at all.

R.C Haas defeated some jabroni with a modified Indian Deathlock.

I had heard alot about the developmental guys, especially Lesnar and Waterman was disappointed. They were all green as gourds.

Heat Taping:

Perry Saturn defeated Shawn "Meat" Stasiak with the Rings of Saturn. Nice crowd reaction for Saturn.

Albert defeated Sho Funaki with the Baldo Bomb. Good Comedy match featuring some great bumps from Funaki.

Scotty 2 Hotty defeated the Hurricane (with Mighty Molly) with a reversal of The Hurricane's attempt at the Victory Roll. Crowd loved the Hurricane and popped HUGE for the worm. Post-match there was a hilarious Break Dancing competition, Molly even did the worm to a big pop.

After the ring crew changed the ropes it was time for SMACKDOWN!

In the opening backstage vignette, and arriving Rock was met by Stone Cold who informed him that after he won the Rumble, and Rock defeated Jericho, they would meet at Wrestlemania. Needless to say, the Rock was unimpressed.

William Regal defeated Rob Van Dam by punching him with the Brass Knucks. RVD was over HUGE with the crowd, what happened to his PUSH?

In another backstage vignette, Kurt Angle informed the Rock that after HE won the Rumble, and Rock defeated Jericho, they would meet at Wrestlemania. Needless to say, the Rock was unimpressed, and cut a promo on Angle asking him to close his eyes and imagine beating the Rock at Wrestlemania. Angle was into it as the Rock set the scene in vivid detail. Then the Rock made Angle wake up and smell what the Rock was cooking!

In another backstage vignette, The Undertaker informed the Rock that after HE won the Rumble, and Rock defeated Jericho, they would meet at Wrestlemania. Needless to say, the Rock was unimpressed.

Mr. ASSGUNN defeated Tajiri with the Fameasser. Crowd loved the Japanese Buzzsaw. Tajiri hit his signature spots including the awesome kicks and the tarantula. Chucky Palumbo took the Green Mist of Death. After the match ended, Mr. Ass (which takes on a whole new significance with the new gimmick) held Tajiri so that Palumbo could deliver the Jungle Kick. Tori was hot as usual.

Diamond Dallas Page defeated the Bossman with the Diamond Cutter. Crowd was dead for this match, but the bookers are dead on about opponents if the want to turn DDP face. The Boss Man Sucks! I could throw a better punch!

In another backstage vignette, The GAME informed the Rock that after HE won the Rumble, and Rock defeated Jericho, they would meet at Wrestlemania. Needless to say, the Rock was unimpressed.

Backstage Stone Cold was banning Debra from ringside and telling her feud with Stephanie would have to wait.

Rikishi defeated Christian and Lance Storm in a "Handicap Over the Top Rope" Match. Storm was the lucky recipient of the stink face. Post match, the Big Show came down and dumped Rikishi, The APA appeared and tossed Show. After attempting to throw each other over, the APA were eliminated Kane who came out to a huge pop. Kane then lit up the ringposts - I guess he is the winner!

The Rock the came out and cut a hilarious promo about how for the first time in history, EVERYBODY was going to win the Royal Rumble. He took the camera away from the ring cameraman and pointed it at him - "This jabroni thinks he will win the Rumble!" roared the Rock. Panning the Crowd, he settled on section 108 - "Everybody in section 108 thinks they are gonna win the Rumble" yelled the Rock. Pointing the lens at a small kid at ringside, the Rock exclaimed, "this six year old kid thinks HE is gonna win the Royal Rumble!" And finally, pointing the camera at a ringside hottie "This hot little number with the 'What are ya Doing after the Show, Rock' sign thinks SHE is gonna win the Rumble." Jericho comes out to the stage at this point and cuts the best promo he has done in the WWF. Jericho is angry and hurt that all the WWF Superstars assume that he will lose to the Rock, and that he is just a Transitional Champion. This championship is MINE, MINE, MINE, MINE!!! screamed Jericho - who seemed on the verge of tears. A classic whining baby champion promo. I hope it comes of on television. Rock and Jericho confront each other at the top of the ramp, but Rock walks away.

Backstage, HHH bans Stephanie from Ringside!

Test defeated Edge via DQ, after Edge uses a chair. Regal came out to interfere and both he and Test ended up on the wrong end of Edge's chair shots. After the DQ, Edge lid a chairshot on Nick Patrick to the crowd's delight.

Outside in the parking lot, Spike and Tazz are ambushed by The Dudleys as they get out of the car. Tazz is locked in the trunk as the Dudleys DESTROY Spike - including a nasty 3D on the asphalt.

In the Main event HHH and StoneCold defeated Booker T and Kurt Angle when HHH pedigreed Booker. Good brawling match featuring lots of Angle suplexes and Booker T kicks. Austin did the majority of the in ring work playing a bulked up Ricky Morton. (NOT!!!!). The end came when Booker escaped a stunner attempt and turn around into the pedigree. After the match, undertaker came out to the stage and had a staredown with HHH and Austin..

When the cameras stopped rolling, Austin and HHH had a few beers and milked the "WHAT" thing for all it was worth. The crowd ate it up for 10 minutes.

Observations:

Thank god, very little Stephanie!

Why no Flair or Vince?

Crowd was dead in spots. I am anxious to see how post-production handles it.

Great show!

Be sure to check out SmackDown! on UPN on Thursday night, and to check back here to WL on Friday for Eitan's full recap!

E-MAIL RICK SCAIA
BROWSE THE OO ARCHIVES

Rick Scaia is a wrestling fan from Dayton, OH. He's been doing this since 1995, but enjoyed it best when the suckers from SportsLine were actually PAYING him to be a fan.

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