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ONLINE ONSLAUGHT
NEWSFLASH: Final Tally of Draft Lottery
and Post-Lottery Trading
July 1, 2005

by Rick Scaia
Exclusive to OnlineOnslaught.com

 

This is not an OOfficial edition of OO, kids. I may or may not list it in my archives, but even if I do, this does NOT count as "canon," OK? Consider this to like my own version of the Simpsons' "Treehouse of Horror" specials... oh sure, they're still fun and everything, but they don't "count" like the real episodes.

So it's with that in mind that this is 

the end of my one-quarter-size pre-ramble, since really all I'm here to do is quickly fill you in on the end of the Draft Lottery, including last night's final trades. I figure this is important enough that you'd want to know about it before Monday.

Here:

  • Last night on SmackDown!, the final to draftees from RAW were announced.
     
    Christian took Big Show's place in the six-man elimination match, and was the last man eliminated by winner, JBL. But JBL did *not* win a new "SD! Title," because Teddy Long then announced that there was no need for such a title, as the FINAL SD! Draft Pick was Batista. No title unification will be forthcoming, although JBL was given the position of #1 Contender to Batista by virtue of winning the six-man.
     
    All in all, I ended up being mildly disappointed by SD!... they kinda got to the same basic spot I thought they might, but somehow did it with more bluster and fluff than I would have liked. Without the prospect of a title unification, Batista's arrival (and a limp staredown with JBL to end the show, no hostilities and not even a promo by Batista, which is inexcusable if you want to make this seem like a big deal) was not nearly as exciting as I'd have guessed. Don't know why, but after I'd gotten myself geared up for an awesome blow-off to the Draft Lottery, I felt let down by the show. An unexpectedly mega-lame twist in the Eddie/Rey story didn't help matters, either, since I thought that was the one feud I could count on to never piss me off.
     
    Full details are in Danny's SD! Recap.
     
  • That means the final tally in the Draft Lottery was...
     
    RAW gets: John Cena (WWE Champ), Kurt Angle, Carlito Cool, Big Show, and Rob Van Dam.
     
    SD! gets: Chris Benoit, Randy Orton, Muhammad Hassan (w/ Daivari), Christian, and Batista (World Champ).
     
    To me, that's pretty even... Cena and Batista cancel each other out (both are champs); I think Carlito and Hassan cancel each other out (both are heels on the rise); Angle and Christian cancel each other out (assuming this move elevates Christian to the top of the card, at least, in which case it's a trade of upper-tier heels); Benoit and Van Dam cancel each other out (both are potential main event faces, who each seems to be criminally misutilized); which I guess means I have to find some way to equate Big Show and Orton (both are guys who seem well-pushed at most times, but never quite manage to breakthrough to true superstar status?).
     
    If there's a little edge, it might go to SD!, who got Daivari as an "add-in" with Hassan and who could (if they let him) really open your eyes in the Cruiserweight Division.
     
  • But! The Draft was only HALF the story... because last night at midnight, WWE.com announced the General Manager Trades. It amounts to a 5-for-5 swap, just like the Draft was, except with nobody you care nearly as much about.
     
    And get these lists, cuz they make NO fucking sense to me...
     
    RAW gets: Chavo Guerrero, Rene Dupree, Kenzo Suzuki (w/ Hiroko), Danny Basham, and Mark Jindrak.
     
    SD! gets: William Regal, Stevie Richards, Simon Dean, Sylvian Grenier, and Boobies McTitsalot (sorry, Erin, but come Monday, you're gonna be out exactly one (1) dismissive nickname for your bRAWd Recap).
     
    If anybody can explain ANY of these 10 trades to me (except for Boobies, since putting her over on SD! probably plays better to whatever passes for her strengths as a "diva"), I'm listening. Because for EVERY SINGLE ONE of the other ones, I can give you at least 1 good reason for why trading them is dumb. And ZERO good reasons for why trading them is smart.
     
    And meantime, the SMART trades, the ones that would have fit into some potentially interesting career resuscitations went unmade. How hard would it have been to do a Tomko-for-Morgan trade so that Christian and Carlito retain some back-up? Why aren't Charlie Haas and Michelle McCool headed to RAW, where both could make themselves useful in ways that they never will on SD!? Why not do the Eugene-to-SD! thing, since I finally decided Wednesday that it's the one trade that almost makes TOO MUCH sense NOT to do (since Bischoff SHOULD have used this as his chance to be rid of his meddlesome nephew)? I could go on... but suffice to say, there were good trades to be made, and these are NONE of them. In fact, nine of them strike me as willfully STUPID.
     
    Prove me wrong, WWE, prove me wrong. More thoughts, analysis, and breakdown in my Monday column.
     
  • Really quick: last night's SD! rating was a very unimpressive 3.1. That's below SD!'s usual average, and on top of that, illustrates that SD! got absolutely ZERO bump in interest from Monday's huge RAW audience.
     
  • I think that's really all I'm gonna bother with today. Like I said: purely informational here. I'll catch you Monday with something a little bigger and better. We'll do RAW Preview, for sure... but also WWE has announced its latest financial data, so we'll have some fun with that. And there's some other news collecting, too (OMG~! WWE has fired a Major Television Personality~! How can I POSSIBLY justify teasing you with this until Monday~!~?~!~? Simple: because it's only Marc Loyd), so I'll have all that for your Holiday Reading Enjoyment.
     
    See you then. And in the interim: check out the Slamspiration posters, dammit. That's good stuff.


  
SMACKDOWN RECAP: Bonding Exercises
 
RAW RECAP: The New Guy Blows It
 
PPV RECAP: WWE Night of Champions 2012
 
SMACKDOWN RECAP: 18 Seconds? NO! NO! NO!
 
RAW RECAP: The Show Must Go On
 
SMACKDOWN RECAP: The Boot Gets the Boot
 
RAW RECAP: Heyman Lands an Expansion Franchise
 
SMACKDOWN RECAP: Losing is the new Winning
 
RAW RECAP: Say My Name
 
SMACKDOWN RECAP: Deja Vu All Over Again
 
RAW RECAP: Dignity Before Gold?
 
PPV RECAP: SummerSlam 2012
 
SMACKDOWN RECAP: Backfired!
 
RAW RECAP: Bigger IS Better
 
SMACKDOWN RECAP: Hitting with Two Strikes
 
RAW RECAP: Heel, or Tweener?
 
SMACKDOWN RECAP: Destiny Do-Over
 
RAW RECAP: CM Punk is Not a Fan of Dwayne
 
SMACKDOWN RECAP: The Returnening
 
RAW RECAP: Countdown to 1000
 
PPV RECAP: WWE Money in the Bank 2012
 
SMACKDOWN RECAP: Friday Night ZackDown
 
RAW RECAP: Closure's a Bitch
 
SMACKDOWN RECAP: In-BRO-pendence Day
 
RAW RECAP: Crazy Gets What Crazy Wants
 
SMACKDOWN RECAP: Five Surprising MitB Deposits
 
RAW RECAP: Weeeellll, It's a Big MitB
 
SMACKDOWN RECAP: #striketwo
 
RAW RECAP: Johnny B. Gone
 
PPV RECAP: WWE No Way Out 2012
 
RAW RECAP: Crazy Go Nuts
 
SMACKDOWN RECAP: You're Welcome
 
RAW RECAP: Be a Star, My Ass
 
SMACKDOWN RECAP: Needs More Kane?
 
RAW RECAP: You Can't See Him
 
SMACKDOWN RECAP: Lady Power
 
RAW RECAP: Big Johnny Still in Charge
 
PPV RECAP: WWE Over the Limit 2012
 
SMACKDOWN RECAP: One Gullible Fella
 
RAW RECAP: Anvil, or Red Herring?
 
SMACKDOWN RECAP: Everybody Hates Berto
 
RAW RECAP: Look Who's Back
 
SMACKDOWN RECAP: Care to go Best of Five?
 
RAW RECAP: An Ace Up His Sleeve
 
PPV RECAP: WWE Extreme Rules 2012
 
SMACKDOWN RECAP: Sh-Sh-Sheamus and the nOObs
 
RAW RECAP: Edge, the Motivational Speaker?
 
SMACKDOWN RECAP: AJ is Angry, Jilted
 
RAW RECAP: Maybe Cena DOES Suck?
 
SMACKDOWN RECAP: No! No! No!
 
RAW RECAP: Brock's a Jerk
 
SMACKDOWN RECAP: Back with a Bang
 
RAW RECAP: Yes! Yes! Yes!
 
PPV RECAP: WWE WrestleMania 28

 
 
E-MAIL RICK SCAIA

BROWSE THE OO ARCHIVES

Rick Scaia is a wrestling fan from Dayton, OH.  He's been doing this since 1995, but enjoyed it best when the suckers from SportsLine were actually PAYING him to be a fan.

 

 

 


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