Featuring Many Current and Past OO Columnists 
Ratings Compiled by Rick Scaia

OOficial Brand of the Week:
RAW
RAW: 4.03  --/-- SD!: 2.55

RATING SYSTEM: Rather than go with the standard 1-10 integer scale for rating shows, OO has selected a 0.0-5.0 rating scheme.  Not only does this allow the reviewer to more precisely award points, but more importantly, it is our belief that our ratings will, in a way, be comparable to the weekly Nielsen Ratings.  Our ratings are based on show quality, however, whereas Nielsen's are based on eyeballs.  Just as WWE hasn't reached the real world 5.0 mark in a long, long time, it will take a monumental effort for a show to earn the highest OO World ratings...  but piss us off in a given week, and we'll be rating you like you're Nitro and it's 2001. 

RAW (4/12/04) vs. SMACKDOWN! (4/15/04)  
OOFICIAL RATINGS

Canadian Bulldog 
RAW: 3.8
The good: Great main event that didn't DETRACT from what you're going to see at Backlash but actually ADDED to the hype. Wow, what a radical concept! SmackDown people, take note. In fact, the whole show was a well-done hype job for the PPV, and there's nothing wrong with that.... While I thought they should have waited until Backlash to do Tajiri Vs. Coach's Ninja, the segment was harmless enough and funny besides. Hot crowd throughout the night, too.

The bad: This one is kind of beyond WWE's control, but it's the reason for my lower-than-the-norm rating for such a good show. Here in Canada, I didn't catch the show until almost 24 hours later because of The Sports Network's ridiculous decision to show nonstop playoff hockey. On Monday, the coverage went until midnight, so I waited until Tuesday, and of course THAT was delayed as well. By the time I'd read the results online and everyone's opinions, the actual show was less-appealing than normal for me. Anyways, not much you can do about it, I suppose... Grandmaster Sexay's big return was all wrong. First, he should be on SmackDown, where they frankly need more people and the guy has a built in storyline either with or against the team of Too Phat. Secondly, there was NO reason for him to get squashed by Kane. The Big Red Machine could have gone over anyone else on the roster with the same effect. What, did Lance Storm suddenly come down with the flu? Was Tommy Dre! amer busy washing his hair in the back? And what about Maven?

SmackDown!: 1.5 
The good: Let's not go there.

The bad: Where to begin? How about this ENTIRE SHOW? I mean, while I think Booker T and Rob Van Dam makes for an excellent matchup, the build to this was piss-poor. They could have held off their first one-on-one until the May PPV and no one would have cared. Hell, that may have been one of the reasons to watch the pay-per-view (again, guys -- hype GOOD, hurt BAD). And the fact that it ended in a DQ does NOT make me want to watch them again, just because the issue has been handled so badly... john Cena-Chavo Guerrero was lame for talents like that... Eddie Guerrero-Big Show was an okay match, but then they erase any positive memories I had of that with what will be herefore referred to as The Worst Ending To Any Television Show Ever. And yes, that includes the series finale of The Cosby Show.

I mean, what the FUCK was that? Seriously! If you want to do a 'wrestler snapping and threatening to drop a diva off a scaffold, but tosses the general manager instead' angle (and really, who doesn't?), do it right. First, give Show a few weeks to get frustrated with his lot in life, give us a few hints that he's going crazy. Then and only then you promote an all-or-nothing match involving Show (where he doesn't 'voluntarily' quit, by the way) and advertise it a week in advance. THEN you have him grab Torrie, completely at random. But you DON'T let them have having a nice, drawn-out conversation like they had:

Big Show: Were you laughing at me?
Torrie Wilson: No.
Big Show: You sure?
Torrie Wilson: Yes!
Big Show: Because I thought you were maybe laughing at me.
Torrie Wilson: No.
Big Show: Then what were you laughing at?
Torrie Wilson: Inside The Ropes by Canadian Bulldog.
Big Show: Yeah, that is a pretty funny column.
Torrie Wilson: So... uh, can I go now?
Big Show: (pensive) So you weren't laughing at me, right?

Finally, you have him drop Torrie, not Angle, off the scaffold (pretend to, or do it for real, doesn't matter to me) and end the show like that. Much more effective, and much less fucking ridiculous.

Bulldogs battle-to-date averages: RAW (3.2), SD! (2.9).

 
Adam Gutschmidt 
RAW: 4.0
Raw did everything right in its home stretch toward Backlash.  It also helped that they had a super-hot crowd in Chicago.  The 8-man was awesome and I felt it could have easily gone another 10-20 mins. and I would not have gotten bored with it.  I absolutely loved the Benjamin attack on Flair and now I'm really excited about that match.  The Jericho and Tristian stuff was fantastic minus the awful Lita match.  Everything else was fun and harmless.  Yes, even Eugene.

SmackDown!: 3.5
Well, there were SOME improvements this week, but not much.  They gave us some more marquee matchups that at least held my attention even if they weren't ***** classics.  I'm still baffled though as to why some of the most over stars on the roster continue to be left off TV; namely The Undertaker and Rey Mysterio.  I'm not quite sure where they are going with the Big Show/Angle thing but I am perplexed.  That segment was very hokey as there is no way Angle would really survive that fall but it does give me at least one reason to tune in next week.  Lord knows JBL isn't drawing me in. 

Adam's battle-to-date averages: RAW (3.7), SD! (3.3).
 

Matt Hocking 
RAW: 4.1
JR:  What a way to head to Backlash!
JL:  I know!  I can't believe they hired my son either!
JR:  I...uh...I meant the awesome main event, King.
JL:  Whatever you say, J.R.
GMS:  I'm back!  AHAHAHAHA!  Screw you, Suckers!
JR:  If I was still head of Talent Relations you'd still be in TNA, jackass.
JL:  T and A?!  PUPPIES!
JR:  Oh, for pete's....
GMS:  I couldn't believe all the wrestling on this show.  What the hell?
JL:  I know.  WTF, Right?
HHH:  RATE!  RATE!  RATE!
JR:  I dunno.  4.1?
JL:  4.1?  That's how old my girlfriend is!
GMS:  He's not kidding.  He met her on Instant Messenger.
HHH:  Cut!

SmackDown!: 2.7 
MC:  WTF was all that crap?
TZ:  I...I dunno, man.  Things were going kind of well, and then the entire last hour kinda just...collapsed in on itself.
MC:  Kind of like Kurt Angle's leg!
TZ:  Heheheheh...Yeah.
MC:  What the hell was that random platform up there for anyway?
TZ:  That arena was developed by first person shooter level designers.
MC:  Kinda reminded me of Mario brothers what with the Princess and the dragon and the fire....
UD:  Speaking of Dragons, I'm going to take an entirely inconspicuous Leave of Dragonabsence that just so happens to coincide with HHH's.  Not that they're related or anything.
TZ:  Whatever.  Here's our special guest, Kurt Angle.
KA:  ...

TZ:  Thanks for that, Kurt!
KA:   ...
MC:  I'm giving Smackdown a 9!
TZ:  WHAT?!
MC:  I dunno...I like...Rico?
TZ:  More like 2.7.  Dumbass.
KA:  ow.
TZ:  Dude, it looked like you fell about two feet, the camera switch was not very inconspicuous.
KA:  Sell the angle, bitch.
TZ:  Oh, I'll sell you all right...

Matt's battle-to-date averages: RAW (3.7), SD! (3.3).

 
Rick Scaia  
RAW: 4.2
More Foley promo goodness (and an even better video package). A fun/insider angle with Tajiri, Coach, and Al Snow.  Really amusing Highlight Reel stuff and a hot heel beatdown with Jericho, Christian, and Trish.  Eugene didn't totally suck.  And then an absolute killer of a main event wrestling match to put the cherry on top.  What am I supposed to complain about?  The answer, if you've been paying attention, is "Molly Holly getting the shaft," but that's really neither here nor there.  Another outstanding edition of RAW. 

SmackDown!: 2.5 
Well, at least SD! decided to not just stand around and be boring.  They gave us a little bit of good, and augmented it with a little bit of suck.  The final rating is still utterly average, but they got there a different way than they've been the past few weeks.  They had a little more in-ring goodness than has been present lately (Cena/Chavo was my fav, but Eddie/Show and RVD/Booker were both very good, too), and in theory, the idea of Big Show putting his career on the line is interesting and gets people talking.  But in execution... man, did that ever suck.  Look, we already had people on SD! over-reacting to stupid nonsense like trophies.  Now, you have Show acting completely unreasonably.  As you know, one of my heuristics for pro wrestling angles is the "Eyeball Rolling Factor."  And when people are getting irate about broken trophies and committing homicide because somebody laughed at a joke, I roll my eyeballs, and I do not have a good time.  Show needs time off to get his surgeries?  Fine, but I could have come up with about a thousand better ways to handle it.  Here's one: Show makes his boast about winning or quitting, manhandles Eddie and looks really good, and then Bradshaw comes out and interferes.  He "accidentally" costs Show the match.  Eddie has been brutalized for 12 minutes.  And now Show, a possible foe and rival, has to quit: Bradshaw orchestrated it all.  As un-thrilling as his heel push has been, he could use a bit of cleverness like that so that he's not a Ted DiBiase rip-off and a charicature.  And then Show's outro could have been attacking Bradshaw somehow, re-leveling the playing field for Eddie.  Show goes away for 2-3 months, and when he comes back, he can go either heel or face, go after Bradshaw or after Eddie.  Now, not only did last night's angle suck in the cheesiest of ways, but Show's eventual return doesn't have nearly as many possibilities.  Just a poorly conceived climax.  But there were signs of life elsewhere on the show, so still... SD! manages an average rating.

Rick's battle-to-date averages: RAW (3.3), SD! (3.6).

FINAL OO RATINGS, WEEK ENDING 4/16/04

RAW average: 4.03
Actual Nielsen Rating: 3.3 (converted to broadcast rating)  
RAW OVERdelivers versus actual rating this week.

SmackDown! average: 2.55 
Actual Nielsen Rating:  2.9 (prelim rating)  
SD! UNDERdelivers versus actual rating this week.

BATTLE TO DATE TALLIES

Average OO Rating for RAW:  3.25 
Average Nielsen Rating for RAW: 3.16 
RAW is OVERdelivering, on average, versus actual ratings since the start of the Battle.

Average OO Rating for SD: 3.31 
Average Nielsen Rating for SD:  3.33 
SD! is UNDERdelivering, on average, versus actual ratings since the start of the Battle.

Rounds Won by RAW: 20 
Rounds Won by SD!: 23  
Current Streak: 4 by RAW (Since 3/26/04) 
Longest Streak: 7 by SD! (6/27/03 thru 8/08/03)

BROWSE PAST WEEK'S BATTLES OF THE BRANDS  

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