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11/22: Big Bad Shooty Daddy
November 25, 2002

by EC Ostermeyer


This is the WWE Byte This! "Lyte Bytez" report for Friday, 22 November 2002.

I am a very busy E.C. this week, so this report will of necessity be briefer than normal. 
Please bear in mind that there will be no regular "Byte This!" show next week due to the Thanksgiving holiday. 
Well, you can't expect Kevin Kelly to finish eating on Thursday, now can you?

Prior to the 

Opening Credits

We get highlights from the Survivor Series PPV's Main Event, the infamous "Elimination Chamber" Main Event match between Shawn Michaels and HHH.

HBK's "Sweet Chin Music" will do it every time.

"I don't believe it!" screeches Jim Ross.
"People all over the world don't believe it!" cheers Jerry Lawler.
"Do you believe in miracles?" crows Jim Ross, unknowingly echoing Al Michaels at Lake Placid in 1980.

And here's Kevin Kelly and Dr. Tom Prichard, live from Titan Tower in Stamford, CT.
They give a brief rundown on the results of Survivor Series, including the five Title changes that occurred.
Today's scheduled guests are Edge, former "Right To Censor" enforcer (Bull) Buchanan, who's just back from his term on the farm club, and ol' Big Poppa Pump himself, Scott Steiner.

In his "Two Cents" portion of the program, Darren "Droz" Drozdov says that, unlike chain-link fencing used in "Steel Cage" matches the construction of the "Elimination Chamber" itself had no give to it, meaning that any shot off the cage itself hurt that much more. 
Kelly remarks that the "Survivor Series" Curse continues for HHH, who has never won a match at Survivor Series yet; indeed, then Curse almost took him out this time, what with that bruised larynx he suffered at the hands (or knee) of Rob Van Dam.
Droz continues by saying that he's unsure whether or not Shawn Michaels will be a viable defender of the WWE Heavyweight Title on Monday's Raw show, when his first Title defense is against Rob Van Dam.

Regarding Scott Steiner's debut and apparent free-agency, Droz says that he will be a welcome addition to either promotion, and that we should see some spirited bidding for his services between Raw GM Eric Bischoff and Smackdown GM Stephanie McMahon. In that regard, Droz also gives the slight edge to Bischoff on his past history with Steiner alone.
Kelly remarks that Scott Steiner cannot look any lower than Smackdown's World Title or Raw's Heavyweight Title. Given who are the current Title holders in each promotion, Kelly surmises that Steiner may have his sights set on the Heartbreak Kid, rather than the Big Show.

In that vein, the first caller wants to know how long Big Show plans on keeping the World Title when he's in such bad shape physically?
Kelly, not being smug for once, says that Big Show knows that, if he doesn't get the weight off, he won't be the Champ for long, and therefore, he's hired the services of a personal trainer to get the job done.

A Chatroom question wants to know when we can expect to see a push for Batista getting started? 
Kelly, bubbling over with candor once more (?) says that, unlike the Big Show, whose problem is of a physical nature, Batista's problem is mental, specifically a crisis of confidence, which is being addressed. He's improving on a weekly basis.

We take a break and watch Smackdown highlights from Big Show's first Title defense against Edge.

Edge is on the phone, saying that it is not a question of "if," but "when" he gets the World Title. He gives credit to Kurt Angle for helping him to find new confidence and a new attitude while Edge was recovering from his injury earlier in the year.
He also credits the work Eddie Guerrero has done with him, along with his new partner, Rey Mysterio.
"Watching Rey and Eddie do some of the spectacular moves that they do in the ring," says Edge, "I want to say, "All right, you do all that stuff of yours, and I'll throw in a clothesline or two just to keep my hand in, okay?" They do all the aerial stuff, and I do the ground-work!"

Kelly remarks that Edge's stock is pretty high right now in the wrestling world, and asks if that has put any additional pressure on him to "live up to expectations?" 
Edge says that he will just keep doing what he's doing, and the rest will follow; it's been a successful way of doing things so far.
The Chatroom asks what Edge does to get ready for a match?
Edge says that he gets all pumped up listening to his intro music just before he walks down the ramp.
Speaking of intro music, Edge relates the current status of his sort-of rock band, "Electric Mustard." Seems this was one step up from a garage band, and featured Rhyno in a pinstripe suit as their dancing, silent front man. Their one and only "hit" was a knock-off of Loverboy's "Workin' For the Weekend," which wound up as the outgoing message on Edge's answering machine!

Edge leaves the show, as Kelly asks about Dr. Tom's new biggest fan, Josie Scott from "Saliva."
"Did he hug you, Dr. Tom?"
"Uhh, yeah, I guess so."
"Was it a 'manly' hug?"
"Of course!"

More Smackdown highlights, this time featuring hat-enhanced Buchanan preventing John Cena's bacon from becoming pressed ham, at the hands (or butt!) of Rikishi.
Buchanan's on the phone, with a very smooth South Carolina-style southern accent much in evidence. He says that his return to the WWE ring last night had him so pumped, he would have bench-pressed Rikishi if they'd asked him to.
Dr. Tom asks if John Cena is looking for some rub off Buchanan?
"Cena has all he needs to be a major star in this business," says Buchanan, "we haven't yet seen what he's really capable of on the stick yet, but from what I saw of him down in Louisville, he's got no problem in that area, either. He and I are looking around right, now, and there's not much happening with the Smackdown Tag Titles that I can see. Maybe that's where we need to be. Smackdown needs some tag teams that will stick together for a while, working as a team, and not like two singles workers who got thrown together at the last minute."

Caller Victor wants to know if we will be able to see Buchanan's spectacular Bicycle Kick anytime soon? Buchanan says that it's definitely there in his toolbox, he just hasn't found a good moment to bring it back out yet.
The Chatroomers want to know his thoughts about the "Right To Censor" angle?
"I loved it a lot," says Buchanan, "although the shirt and tie bit wasn't really too cool. Still, we had some great guys working that angle, with Val Venis, The Godfather, Ivory, and of course, Steve Richards all contributing to its success."

Kelly asks about the long idleness after the RTC angle folded?
"I never expected to be gone this long (from the WWE ring)," says Buchanan, " the longer it lasted the more frustrated I got. Some nights, I'd start watching Raw, and I'd have to go down to my basement and take out my frustrations on the heavy bag..."

"Yeah," says Kelly, "I'm married to one of those..."
"Whoa now, Kev," says Dr. Tom in a warning tone.
Buchanan laughs, saying that if he tried that with his own wife, HE'D be the heavy bag instead of her.
"The WWE took good care of me and my family during the down-time, too," says Buchanan in closing, "but once wrestling's in your blood, you'd just about want to work for a burger and Coke just so's you'd get the chance to be in the ring once more. I am real glad to be back."

Another break, and we watch footage from Scott Steiner's debut on Raw, and his fracas with Chris Jericho and Christian.

And live on the phone is Scott Steiner, who sounds nervous as all get-out.
"I didn't know how that Madison Square Garden crowd would react when I got in the ring," says Steiner, "they're the toughest fans we got. But to hear the crowd cheer for me and shout out my catch-phrases, it was really great!"

Steiner's also getting along with everyone in the locker room, too. Kelly asks him about his meeting with Vince McMahon, and Steiner says that it went fine, just like the first time he was in the WWE, way back in 1992.
"Did you ever expect to be here in WWE when WCW folded in March of 2001, Scott?" asks Kelly.
"No," says Steiner, "but I wasn't ready to retire, either. I kept myself in shape, and waited. Looks like my waiting paid off."
Kelly wants to know where Steiner came up with all his "Steiner-isms?"
"Well, 'Boom Shaka Laka,' that's from when I am with my freaks," says Steiner, "I mean, you do the 'Boom Shaka Laka' to 'em until they faint, and then you go about your business."
"What about that 'Internet Rumor' about you being dead?" asks Kelly.
"Obviously untrue," growls Steiner.
"And your reputation as a troublemaker in the locker room?"
"Also untrue. I show up to work like everyone else. I do my job like everyone else. I don't like it when people lie to me. They lie to me and I do something about it. You mess with me, you get one chance. But not two."

Caller Billy wants to know where he can get that cool Egyptian cowl like Steiner wears to the ring?
"Actually," says Steiner with a laugh, "it's a chain mail cowl I bought in England. I got it because my Freak of the Moment liked me wearing it when we were together. Then, I got to wearing it to the ring and it became part of my gear."
"So you got this cowl-thing to please your, uh, 'freak' because it turned her on when you two were..." says Kelly, mulling the possibilities.
"Yep," says Steiner, "if my freaks are into toys, I'm here to satisfy!"
"Hmmmm," says Kelly, still mulling.

(Miz Kelly better look out. Or maybe not. I don't think the Brits make chain mail cowls to fit a head the size of which would make Shrek gulp in disbelief, do you?)

Moving on, Kelly says he heard that, when Steiner was in WCW, he had to do his own entrance music.
"Yeah," say Steiner, "this was right after I turned on my brother Rick and joined the NWO. On my next match, the WCW Production people had me coming down to the ring to the old Steiner Brothers entrance music. That wouldn't do, so I came out to no music at all for the rest of that tour. Then when I got back to Atlanta, I got with a recording studio and had them work me up some new entrance music, and it wound up I had to pay for it, too. Stuff like that is one of the reasons WCW is out of business."

Dr. Tom asks how Scott's brother Rick Steiner is doing?
"He's doing well over in Japan," says Steiner.
"Any chance of you two teaming up again?"
"Not at this time," say Steiner, "but you never know."
Kelly wants to know which promotion Steiner will join, Raw or Smackdown?
"It's too early to make that decision just yet," says Steiner, "soon, though."

Kelly remarks that Scott Steiner was one of the first wrestlers to have an amateur and Olympic background, and wants his thoughts on the latest crop, namely Kurt Angle, and Brock Lesnar?
Steiner says that Angle and Lesnar are the future of the business; they give the fans what they want to see each and every week. Take Lesnar," say Steiner, "if you catch the hip just right, you can suplex anyone. But to do that to the Big Show, that takes strength conditioning to go with the know-how. You only get that from a wrestler with amateur/Olympic class knowledge. Lesnar made suplexing 500 lbs. look easy."

Dr. Tom asks Steiner his thoughts on watching Raw week after week.
"These guys who got out there saying that they're the greatest there ever was," kayfabes Steiner, referring to Chris Jericho, "they know who's the greatest there ever was. What did they think, I was sitting at home, drinking beer and eating potato chips? Guess they were wrong, huh? Y'know, I was born p.o-ed. To hear other people brag about how they were the best there ever was, that makes me REALLY p.o.-ed!"

Dr. Tom wants to know when Steiner and Brock Lesnar will meet in the ring?
"I don't know when," says Steiner, "but we will meet. Maybe in the ring. Maybe in the back. We'll see."

Kelly thanks Scott Steiner for being on the show, then he and Dr. Tom wrap things up by reminding everyone that there will be no Byte This! show next week due to the Thanksgiving holiday.

See you in two weeks, and have a Happy Thanksgiving everyone!


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