Powered by LiquidWeb Search all of OO for news, columnists, and articles about your favorites!
News  -/-  Recaps  -/-  Columns  -/-  Features  -/-  Reference  -/-  Archives  -/-  Interact  -/-  Site Info

Donate to Online Onslaught!
     Daily Onslaught
     Obtuse Angle
     RAW Satire
     The Broad

     Inside the Ropes
     OOld Tyme
         Rasslin' Revue
     Title Wave
Crashing the

     Smarky Awards
     Big in Japan
     Guest Columnists
     2 Out of 3 Falls
     Devil's Due
     The Ring
     The Little Things
SK Rants
The Mac Files
     Sq'd Circle Jerk
     RAW vs. SD!:
         Brand Battle
     Cheap Heat 
     Year in Review
     Monday Wars
     Road to WM 

     Title Histories
     Real Names
     PPV Results
     Smart Glossary
     Message Boards
     Live Chat 
     OO History

If you attend a live show, or have any other news for us, just send an e-mail to this address!  We'd also love to hear from you if you've got suggestions or complaints about the site...  let us have it!

Cena Steps Up, But Says Nary a Word!
February 25, 2005

by Big Danny T.
Exclusive to OnlineOnslaught.com


Ok, so whatd I miss? Titles change hands? Blood spilled in the steel cage? It would seem that a lot can happen in a week, and at the same time, not that much at all. Lets see when we get on with the wrasslin!
Portions of the following program are sponsored by John Bradshaw Layfield.

Tonight, we are invited to celebrate a milestone: JBL celebrates being the longest reigning Champion in 10 years! Join us, will you?

WWE leader, and we recap the events leading up to whether or not Batista will jump to Smackdown or not. We climax 

with his announcement that hes staying on Raw, so enough of that issue, on to Smackdown!

Smackdown opening, we have Pyro and we are Live (taped) from Philadelphia, PA, and later tonight, we are going to have JBLs Celebration of Excellence and Linda McMahon will be showing up to give us the Board of Directors decision on Teddys General Managership.

Viva la Rasa! Rey Mysterio and Eddie Guererro are out to defend their newly won tag team titles against the guys they won them from, The Bashams.

Eddie starts with Danny, and Eddie gets a few arm drags to start. Eddie with an arm wringer, tag to Rey who gets a head scissors for a 2-count. Tag back to Eddie and he stomps Danny down. Eddie into the corner, gets a boot up for Danny, back suplex, cover gets 2. Danny gets a surprise spinebuster and as Eddie lies motionless on the mat, this is as good a time as any to take our first commercial break.

Back, and Eddie knocks Doug down, but he cant get a tag because during the break, Danny took Rey out by ramming him into the ringsteps. Eddie fighting Danny and Doug off, but when he goes to check on Rey, it leaves him open for more pounding by the Bashams. Eddie powers out of a surfboard, but gets scoop slammed by Danny and covered for two. Tag to Doug who hits a pump splash. Cover only nets 2, so he locks in a half crab. Eddie struggling to get to Rey, who has recovered, but Doug lets go and takes Rey out. Cole calls it a cheap shot, looked like sound ring strategy to me. Eddie dragged back across the ring and tag to Danny, Danny brawls Eddie down, but falls prey to a dropkick. Danny gets over and tags Doug in, but their timing is off and Doug gets across the ring way too soon and has to stand there and awkwardly wait on Rey to drop the dime. Stereo 10-punch count along, and they both work the Bashams over. Eddie sets Doug up for the 6-1-9, but Danny interferes and Eddie eats the move. Danny in with a back suplex, and Doug gets a flying headbutt and he covers. 1-2-Eddie breaks it up at 2.99995. More brawling, and this time, 6-1-9 connects on Doug, Edie follows up with a frogsplash, then Rey covers for the 1-2-3 and the Champs retain.

We get a picture package of the Angle/Cena match, and we cut to a locker room full of So-called Divas. A knock at the door heralds the arrival of Orlando Jordan, who is dressed rather dapperly and wants the girls at ringside for JBLs celebration of excellence tonight. He says that they should dress accordingly, which means they will all be wearing evening gowns that could double as swimsuits.

After commercials, Kurt Angle is out for the latest Kurt Angle Hometown Challenge. Kurt cuts his introduction off and tells the fans to knock it off, that hes not in the mood. He gets tonights jobber out here. Its Matt Martel and hes from South Philly. Kurt wants to get it over with, but Matt decides to be a smartass, pulls the mic back and asks Kurt what it was like to lose the #1 contenders match to John Cena. Kurts response is understandable as he knocks poor Matt down and chokes him out on the ropes. Suplex, cover, but Kurt wants to play with him some more. Kurt choking him out in the corner. A couple more suplexes, and Kurt pulls Matt up from another cover to apply more punishment. Kurt toys with him for another 20 seconds or so and finally applies the ankle lock. Matt taps instantly.

After the match, Tazz is in the ring to ask Kurt what he thinks of Shawn Michaels challenge from Raw. After watching the footage Kurt makes to say something, then throws the mic down and leaves without a word.

Outside, a limo pulls up and its more useless eye candy for JBLs celebration. Time for commercials.

America's Top Model... You know if I wanted to watch middlingly attractive stick figures act like primadonna bitches, I'd go to anime conventions... Doh!

Backstage, Josh Matthews has found Heidenreich scribbling furiously on a notepad (at least, I hope thats what hes doing behind that pad) Josh wants to know why he disqualified himself at No Way Out by hitting Booker T with a chair in the throat. Heidenreich calls Josh a little closer and then reads more poetry, talking about how he has no regard for human life and hes happy that he may have ended Bookers career.

This shoots us to the story of how JBL is still the champ. Back to the present, and a number of tuxedoed and evening gowned people are at ringside to celebrate JBL championship.

Backstage, JBL is a mess of stitches and bruises. Orlando says that JBL is in no condition to go out there tonight and that they could postpone, but JBL says that is out of the question. He owes the fans an appearance tonight, and hell give it to them. He then goes to gingerly put the rest of his clothes on and after seeing Linda McMahon get set up in Stamford, we go to commercials.

Back, and weve got a full band set up. Orlando and the Bashams are in the ring and the JBL horns are set up on the ring ropes. Cole and Tazz get into the spirit a bit, with Cole telling Tazz not to drink any of the champagne on air. Orlando kicks things off by calling JBLs reign nothing short of incredible, and wastes no time by heralding him to the ring.

John Bradshaw Layfield makes his entrance, hobbling on down, but still taking time to shake hands and kiss the ladies. He painfully enters the ring, hugs all around for his cabinet, and Orlando is on the mic again. He says that its only fitting that they honor JBL in Philly, a city without class or champions. He then throws it to an opera singer, who gets roundly booed by the audience. After a quick Cena! chant, Orlando says that JBL will go down in history as the greatest champion of all time, and then unveils an oil painting of the champion (Youll probably be able to buy your own on WWE auctions later this month.)

JBL is handed the mic, and says that while Philly doesnt have any champions of their own, they can live vicariously through him. He goes on about how he beat Big Show, about how he has proved the naysayers wrong, and reiterates that he simply cannot be beat. He says its time to get this party started when

Weeeeellllll! The Big Show shows up. He destroys the set, tosses a few of the tuxedoed guys around, and then hits the ring. JBL cowers for a second as Orlando and the Bashams get tossed around and then SURPRISES US ALL by suddenly being not injured and hitting Big Show with a champagne bottle. They start the beat down, but here comes John Cena to provide the rescue for Big Show. Yeah, I cant believe I just typed it either. Well, their combined forces clear the ring of the bad guys, and this brings Theodore long out. Theodore doesnt know whats going to happen with the Board of Directors decision, but as of this moment, He is STILL GM, and he makes the match for tonight: JBL and Orlando Jordan Vs. John Cena and Big Show. This takes us to commercials.

Back, and Chavo Guererro is in the ring and Funaki is exercising his right for a rematch tonight. Funaki has barely gotten in to the ring when Chavo starts kicking away and brawling him down. Chavo locks in an armbar and keeps Funaki down until he gets a flying snap mare to get out. Funaki with elbows to the midsection to gain momentum and now firing away with right hands. They exchange a sequence where Funaki goes for the Tornado DDT, Chavo blocks it, Chavo is set up for the Alabama slam, but Chavo holds on, uses the ring ropes for leverage, and sets Funaki up for the Gory bomb. It hits, and the cover and retention is perfunctory.

After the match, Ultimate Warrior-Cito attacks. You and I know him as Paul London. He is pissed that he got screwed out of the title and dropsaults Chavo out of the ring. Tazz and Cole state that its on! between Chavo and Paul and we go to commercials.

Back, and we have a Handicap match: Mark Jindrak and Luther Reigns are out to take on the Undertaker. After Undertaker makes his entrance, Luther bails and leaves Jindrak to the mercy of Undertaker. Jindrak is able to get away occasionally, but Luther is always out of position for a tag. The last time, Mark gets a spinebuster, but Luther is faking having been knocked down. Mark goes for a cover, but Undertaker pulls him in and locks in a triangle choke. Jindrak taps out and Undertaker wins it.

After the match, Luther is pissed that Jindrak lost the match. Jindrak calls bullshit and tells him that he tried to tag out. Luther gets in Marks face, Mark takes a swing, and the fight is on! Both guys brawl around the ring until the Ref squad is out to break things up. While they get that settled, we go to commercials.

Back, and Theodore Long is in the ring, and he wants to know if Philly is having fun, and to give him a holla! He says that hes been having fun too, but tonight the fun might end, as it potentially might be his last night at GM. He knows that the Board of Directors have reached a decision, and no matter what it is, he is proud to be your General Manager.

I spit in the face of those who are not cool! This brings Carlito Caribbean Cool out, and he corrects Teddy by saying that Teddy meant Im proud to have BEEN your GM. Carlito predicts that Teddy is about to be fired, and that THAT is cool.

This brings Linda McMahon up on the Smackatron. She says that the BoD has reviewed Teddys performance, and while yes, he has shown bias and questionable judgment during his reign, they feel that it has been for the good of Smackdown, therefore, the BoD has decided to retain Theodore Long as Smackdown General Manager. Oh and Carlito, stop calling, we dont want to hear it anymore!

HUGE Teddy chant for this, and Teddy has a mic and tells Carlito that next week, hed better be at work early, and if he thought that life was tough before, its going to be a living hell now. And, in the words of Carlito, Thats cool! Carlito pitches a fit, and we go to commercials.

HHH as Braveheart Road to Wrestlemania commercial. Still pretty funny, but I really wanted to see the Pulp Fiction one.

With 15 minutes left, John Cena and the Big Show are out to take on John Bradshaw Layfield and Orlando Jordan. JBL is till selling a limp. Bad guys jaw jack with good guys and with 10 minutes left, we go to commercials.

Back, and Big Show is slapping Orlando around. Orlando gets tossed around and Big Show throws him at JBL, demanding that he tag in. JBL begging off, so Show tags Cena in who controls until JBL trips him up. Cena now playing face in peril until Big Show charges past the ref to take out JBL and Orlando. Both heels beat down, Show stacks them up in the corner, hits a big splash, then levels Orlando with a shoulderblock. JBL is down outside and not getting up. Cena pumps up, "You cant see me," 5-knuckle shuffle, F-U, cover, pin, and thats that. Cena shows off the spinner belt, JBL cowers with the WWE Championship, Fade out, WWE logo, and were outta here!

Good follow-up show. I like where they are going with everything and the Teddy Long announcement made for some good TV. Oh yeah, and Cena didnt talk. To steal a phrase, Thats cool!

See ya next week!



SMACKDOWN RECAP: Bonding Exercises
RAW RECAP: The New Guy Blows It
PPV RECAP: WWE Night of Champions 2012
RAW RECAP: The Show Must Go On
SMACKDOWN RECAP: The Boot Gets the Boot
RAW RECAP: Heyman Lands an Expansion Franchise
SMACKDOWN RECAP: Losing is the new Winning
RAW RECAP: Say My Name
SMACKDOWN RECAP: Deja Vu All Over Again
RAW RECAP: Dignity Before Gold?
PPV RECAP: SummerSlam 2012
RAW RECAP: Bigger IS Better
SMACKDOWN RECAP: Hitting with Two Strikes
RAW RECAP: Heel, or Tweener?
RAW RECAP: CM Punk is Not a Fan of Dwayne
SMACKDOWN RECAP: The Returnening
RAW RECAP: Countdown to 1000
PPV RECAP: WWE Money in the Bank 2012
SMACKDOWN RECAP: Friday Night ZackDown
RAW RECAP: Closure's a Bitch
RAW RECAP: Crazy Gets What Crazy Wants
SMACKDOWN RECAP: Five Surprising MitB Deposits
RAW RECAP: Weeeellll, It's a Big MitB
RAW RECAP: Johnny B. Gone
PPV RECAP: WWE No Way Out 2012
RAW RECAP: Crazy Go Nuts
RAW RECAP: Be a Star, My Ass
RAW RECAP: You Can't See Him
RAW RECAP: Big Johnny Still in Charge
PPV RECAP: WWE Over the Limit 2012
SMACKDOWN RECAP: One Gullible Fella
RAW RECAP: Anvil, or Red Herring?
SMACKDOWN RECAP: Everybody Hates Berto
RAW RECAP: Look Who's Back
SMACKDOWN RECAP: Care to go Best of Five?
RAW RECAP: An Ace Up His Sleeve
PPV RECAP: WWE Extreme Rules 2012
SMACKDOWN RECAP: Sh-Sh-Sheamus and the nOObs
RAW RECAP: Edge, the Motivational Speaker?
SMACKDOWN RECAP: AJ is Angry, Jilted
RAW RECAP: Maybe Cena DOES Suck?
RAW RECAP: Brock's a Jerk
SMACKDOWN RECAP: Back with a Bang
RAW RECAP: Yes! Yes! Yes!
PPV RECAP: WWE WrestleMania 28




All contents are Copyright 1995-2014 by OOWrestling.com.  All rights reserved.
This website is not affiliated with WWE or any other professional wrestling organization.  Privacy Statement.